A Beginner's Guide to Monster Hunter!

If you have read any of my previous posts on this blog, you'll know that the Monster Hunter franchise is one of my favorite video games ever, and with Monster Hunter: World releasing on the PS4, PC, and XBox One next January (at the time of writing), I've seen what I'm going to forever nickname as the Fire Emblem: Awakening effect, where streamlining features to make them more accessible to general audiences results in a tsunami of newcomers to the franchise. I say this because I keep seeing post after post after post on just about every form of social media of people wanting to get into Monster Hunter precisely because of Monster Hunter: World's more "noob-friendly" approach. For those of you who never heard of Monster Hunter, it's a franchise of Action-Adventure games developed/published by Capcom, and is one of their best-selling franchise of all time, coming second only to Resident Evil and Street Fighter. That's right. Monster Hunter outsold freaking Mega Man. In fact, the franchise has sold over 40 million copies. This franchise, while so hugely popular in Japan, China, and just Eastern Asia in general that the games are guaranteed system sellers (to the point where folks from those regions will buy an entirely new console just to play Monster Hunter games on it), it hasn't met the same success in the United States, due to the game's somewhat steep learning curve, but the newest entry in the franchise, Monster Hunter: World, seeks to change that by streamlining a lot of the features that us Westerners find annoying or unintuitive.



The Monster Hunter series takes place in a Low-Fantasy setting, meaning that while they do take artistic liberties with some of the monsters and weapon designs, they do at least try to make it realistic and even make sure that the abilities of the stronger monsters (such as Rathalos' Flame Breath), no matter how outlandish, are possible in real life. Despite containing a poetic amount of lore and backstory, the Monster Hunter franchise has never been about the the story (to the point where you can literally play the games in any order at all without fear of getting confused by an overarching plot), it's always been about having fun fighting some of (what I personally believe to be) the greatest enemies in video game history.


Alas, poor Valphalk. He/she/it/they might never
get an *official English game...

The way you progress through the games usually involves you selecting one of several missions from a menu accessible in a hub town, called Quests, and heading out to one of six different regions and completing a task. The task can be as mundane as collecting five specific mushrooms, or as exciting as fighting a boss within a time limit. Complete enough Quests and you'll gain access the next tier of Quests, which house more difficult tasks (but rarer and more valuable rewards), and if you beat enough of those, you will unlock even MORE Quests with even better rewards (and even tougher tasks). And once you complete all of those, you unlock High-Rank, a post-game campaign with revamped bosses and even BETTER rewards. And once you complete all the High-Rank Quests, you unlock G-Rank, the highest difficulty, which houses the game(s)'s final boss. And once you beat G-Rank... You're free to do whatever you want, fight any boss you want, craft as many weapons, armor, and items as you want, impose as many silly but impressive challenges (like fighting the final boss with no armor on at all!) as you want. Maybe even show a friend this very beginner's guide to get them hooked on Monster Hunter so you and your friend(s) could play through the co-op campaign together. Heck, for all I know, you could play through the game with your boy/girlfriend during a date or something. I dunno. Nerdy couples do nerdy things. Like make their wedding rings look like the One Ring of Power from Lord of the Rings. ...Completely ignoring the fact that the One Ring of Power is imbued with the soul of a hateful king whose vendetta plunges the world into the dark ages. But I digress!


This is such a cool shot! 

So basically, since I have put in hundreds (maybe thousands) of hours into the franchise, I feel this might be the time to be that cool guy that helps the little guy/gal get past the the admittedly steep learning curve. Keep in mind that my advice, in addition to coming from lessons I've learned the hard way myself, mostly applies across all the games in the franchise, save for Monster Hunter Stories, due to that game basically being "Pokemon with dino-dragons". In case a future Monster Hunter game changes something that renders these tips invalid, let me know.



Part 1: The Basics!

Before you get to the exciting stuff, know this. Monster Hunter games are normally plagued by terribly slow pacing for the first 5-7 or so hours of the story campaign (which is anywhere between 50-90 hours, but there's so much post-campaign stuff to do your playtime will skyrocket), so I'll tell you all this now. If time is a major issue for you, get the 3DS titles (Monster Hunter 4 Ultimate and Monster Hunter Generations) first, since those games have the benefit of being mobile, so you can play a little bit when you have time to kill, and put the game down at a moment's notice. If time is not a major issue for you, I suggest getting Monster Hunter Tri or it's remake, Monster Hunter 3 Ultimate if have a Wii or a Wii U, respectively, since I feel those two games are, at least until Monster Hunter: World releases, the best entry-level titles in the franchise. Because, and I hate to be that guy, but I personally believe that Monster Hunter is at it's best on the big screen (because I'm an **AMERICAN, gosh darn it!). But hey, if you don't have a Wii/Wii U, the 3DS games are still an option.


This pic is from one of the 3DS Monster Hunter
games in case you're wondering about the drop
of graphics quality.

So you just created your brand new character, been shipped off to insert village here (ALL the Monster Hunter games take place in/near a village. Always) and you're ready to kick some beastly booty. But at the beginning of every adventure in the Monster Hunter universe comes one of the most important activities... Gathering things like plants, mushrooms, metals, and insects to craft things such as healing potions, armor, and antidotes to give you an edge. After all, one of the main themes Monster Hunter uses is that with enough preparation you can do anything. 70-story tall living volcano prophesied to devour the universe? With enough prep work you can kick it's booty to kingdom come and back again! Golden Gorilla with a power level of OVER 9000? With enough prep you can not only beat the tar out of him but you can steal his powers for yourself! Half a million annoying triceratops-like monsters constantly interrupting your hunts? With enough prep you can hunt them to extinction! Actually, no, you can't hunt any monster to extinction. After all, some of the monsters you face multiply at an alarming rate (looking at you, Gigginox). Anyway, some important things to note is the UI. The green gauge in the picture above is your health gauge, which, self-explanatory, shows how much damage you can take before dying. The yellow gauge, directly below the health gauge, is the stamina gauge. Basically, certain actions such as sprinting and dodging will consume stamina. Some weapons will alter the UI by adding an additional gauge to monitor (or showing melee weapon durability, represented by a brightly colored knife icon) or showing at a glance how much ammo you have for long-range weapons Speaking of the weapons, let's talk about them for a bit, shall we?



 I Love Switch Axe! :3

Part 2: The Weapons!

Monster Hunter games typically have a ludicrously large arsenal of weapons to choose from, which are divided into fourteen different types. The weapon types are very important, as they dictate what kind of fighting style and combos you will have to work with when equipping the weapon in question, and none of the weapon types play even remotely similarly. For example, Great Swords hit really hard, can block some attacks, and can be charged up to deal even more damage, but are painfully slow, and require you to predict what the monster you're hunting will do next, and position yourself accordingly to get that sweet, sweet charged slam off. Dual Blades, on the other hand, are fast and nimble, can go into a form known as Dragon Stance which lets the user use even deadlier attacks, but in addition to have very limited durability, cannot block at all. Then you have the Heavy Bowgun, which lets you unleash a barrage of bullets and fight from a distance, but suffer from lackluster defenses and and if a fight carries on long enough or you forget to bring spare ammo, you'll actually run out of bullets and be near useless.And my personal favorite of the bunch, the Switch Axe. I LOVE the Switch Axe. It's a weapon that rewards aggressive play, and can switch (heh!) between an Axe form and a Sword form, the former having incredible reach, respectable speed and can (sometimes) knock airborne monsters out of the sky with a uppercut swing, and the latter being capable of dealing absurd amounts of damage in a short span of time, respectively. What's that? Does the Switch Axe have a weakness to balance it out? It can't block. It's not as fast as Dual Blades. It can't stun. It needs a stamina boosting item in order to pull off it's strongest attack. That's it. My opinion obviously isn't biased because it's the one weapon I have most fun using and I use it almost exclusively.



 But my main point is, don't be like "Durr, I'ma Cloud Strife, hurr durr!" and pick the Great Sword because it "looks cool" and then get mad at the game because the Great Sword doesn't fit your style. Try out every weapon type, get a rough idea of what you like, and invest in getting stronger versions of the weapon you like the gameplay of most. Like for me, that would be Switch Axes. Oh, how I LOVE the Switch Axe. Additionally, and this is a quick thing, but when deciding what kind of armor to wear/craft, always go for the one that compliments your weapon (which, in turn, compliments your fighting style). I say this because in addition to boosting your stats, armor in Monster Hunter comes with a variety of passive abilities known as Skills, which further alter your fighting style. For example, if you like dodging attacks and being a total ninja, I suggest shooting for the Lagombi and Nargacuga armor sets, thanks to their Skills boosting mobility and evasion. Or you can mix and match the armor pieces to get only the passive abilities you want with none of the extra skills you could care less about, at the cost of looking like you just got out of bed and forgot how to properly dress yourself due to tiredness. But of course, even with passive Skills boosting them, some weapon types will curbstomp/struggle against certain monsters. Which brings me to my next point.


STEAK!!!

Part 3: MONSTERS!!!


My fav monster versus my least fav weapon! (image
from Monster Hunter 3 Ultimate)

Finally we get to talk about the thing the franchise is most well-known for.  There are often dozens of monsters to do battle with (except for Tri, which only had 19 boss-type monsters and 6 generic enemies), and are considered to be the highlight of the franchise. And why wouldn't the monsters in this franchise be so loved? In addition to sporting majestic, awe-inspiring designs (with few exceptions), the monsters offer some of the most fun, tense, and memorable boss battles in the history of video gaming! But there are some basic rules of thumb to cover that apply to every monster in the franchise. First of all, if enough time passes, the Monster will literally run away and go to another area, forcing you (and your team) to explore the map to find it again. Third, almost every boss battle in the game is timed. It's a very generous timer though, to the point where you'll sometimes forget it exists because the ONLY battles where it comes even remotely close to running out is during the last 3-4 bosses of the post-game (because the time limit is usually an hour real-time). Unless you're playing with a full team of four players, all of whom are rocking fairly decent gear and know how to bring out the best of their chosen weapon types, in which case you can probably take down those 3-4 bosses in about ten minutes. Or you are having a really bad run at an early-to-mid-game monster, in which case, you might run out of time. But the battles were you barely win are the best. Because the easiest way to find out if someone loves Monster Hunter is to ask them who their favorite boss is, and they will ALWAYS without fail, tell you a long and drawn-out story about how they barely beat their favorite boss with two minutes left, or how that boss taught them how to get better at the game. I know this because not only have I seen this happen with my own eyes, I myself am guilty(?) of it.



A word of advice when facing a monster for the first time. DON'T. BE. RECKLESS. Pay attention to the Monster's attacks. Eagle-eyed hunters will notice a definitive pattern. Example, every time Rathian takes a step backward, that means she (all Rathians are, according to the lore, female) is about to do a tail-flip straight ahead. That's your cue to get out of the way and off to the side, where Rathian is most vulnerable. Another example, every time Qurupeco claps it's wings together, that means it's about to jump to a nearby hunter and set him/her on fire, and Qurupeco does this attack twice (sometimes thrice, depending on how many times Qurupeco clapped it's wings). That's your cue to dodge-roll two-three times in a row. Of course, how easy it is to avoid these attacks depends on your weapon, some weapons can block, others can dodge, but some don't have access to either. One of the most important tips I have to recommend is even if you find a weapon type you love and are content to stick with it, I implore you to at least practice with the other weapons. Even though I LOVE Switch Axe and will use and abuse it till the end of times, I must admit that my arch-nemesis, the dreaded Plesioth  is actually fun to fight with a Gun-Lance.



Another word of advice concerning fighting boss monsters. Aim your attacks carefully. Each body part of the Monster counts as a separate hitbox, and some body parts take more damage than others. Of course, given there are no health bars for monsters (the idea being that the monster's body language changes based on well you do), the only way to tell how much damage you're dishing out is either A) pay attention to how many times the monster flinches/staggers when you hit a specific body part, or B) Google it. At least until Monster Hunter: World comes out, as that game offers the option of turning on damage numbers, showing you exactly how much damage you're dishing out, and even color codes the numbers to let you know which body part is the weak point. Additionally, every Monster Hunter game has something known as the "wound" system (sometimes called the "break" system), where if you attack a specific body part enough times, you will inflict a "break". When that happens, a scar will appear on the "broken" body part (or in the case of a tail, the tip of said tail will pop off like a real life lizard tail) and attacks involving that body part become weaker. I strongly encourage you to go for as many breaks as you can, because not only does that make the rest of the hunt that much easier, but there are some materials that can only be acquired through the wound/break system (such as the Rathian Ruby). Of course, not all monsters have the same breaks, and some have more than others. And even then, some monsters can have the same body part break several times in one fight. Agnaktor the flaming crocodile parrot thing, for example, has eight breaks (it's beak, tail x2, back, and all four of it's legs can be broken). And my final tip for fighting boss monsters, is be prepared. It's always a good idea to bring extra healing items, or spare ammo (if you're using a projectile weapon), or steaks. A rule I strongly encourage you to follow through with is capturing the monster instead of killing it. Why? Because not only are there some materials that can only be gained by breaking/wounding monsters, there are also materials that can only be acquired by capturing. Plus, it saves you an extra 5-10 minutes by letting you end the hunt early. To capture a monster, all you have to do is place down a trap (either Pitfall Trap or Shock Trap), wait for the Monster to step on it, and while it's still in the trap, throw an item called a Tranq Bomb at it. Keep in mind that you can only capture a Monster if it has 25% health or lower (when a Monster starts limping instead of running, that's your cue), and even then you have to throw 2-4 Tranq Bombs at a time, it depends on how powerful the monster is. Unfortunately, making Tranq Bombs is one of the more annoying things to craft, because you need to combine a Sap Plant with a Stone, which gets you a bomb casing, and then combine that with tranquilizer (made by combining Sleep Herbs with Parashrooms) to make a Tranq Bomb. Be thankful you can buy tranquilizers at the in-game store later on in the story.



And now for arguably the most important part of this guide.

Part 4: Multiplayer!



One of the reasons Monster Hunter is huge in Japan and starting to reach that hugeness in the West is thanks to one of the best multiplayers this side of Splatoon. But before you dive into the multiplayer, there are some very important things to consider. While hunters can't damage other hunters, they still receive knockback should you hit another player. This also interrupts whatever they were going to do. So take extreme caution when using weapons with a wide-reaching attack, such as the Long-Sword, Gun-Lance, or in some cases, even my beloved Switch Axe. I don't know if Capcom is going to remove the knockback once Monster Hunter: World releases, since this definitely would count as a "quality of life" change, and Monster Hunter: World is full of changes akin to this.


When in doubt, go to the Canteen. 

Just be sure to be polite when playing multiplayer. Don't be that guy who does absolutely nothing but run around like a headless chicken swinging your Great Sword at thin air while the rest of us are busy taking down a Gold Rathian (which is, surprisingly enough, a Rathian covered in Gold) or something, and then take all the credit for our hard work when you inexplicably get a Rathian Ruby when the Quest is cleared. But also don't be that guy who is like, "Oh, you don't have a Blast-element weapon with an armor set with Attack Up Large, Razor Sharp, Bombardier, Challenger, Evasion +3 and Rocksteady? You're trash! I can't be seen with you! *leaves server*". Because I swear, the elitist snobs who judge people for not following whatever the build currently ideal for speedrunning are almost as bad as the folks who run around with no idea what to do and then take all the credit for the competent hunters' hard work. Not everybody wants to speedrun the game, people. There are some folks who play at their own pace. And last, but not least, please don't spam rude or offensive comments in the chat, or behave in a rude/offensive manner in general. Kind of self-explanatory really. If you behave in a rude manner, nobody's going to play with you. While you CAN play through the entire game solo, it's easier, faster, and more fun to do it with other people. Besides, why would you be a jerk to other people who did nothing wrong? Especially in a game about working together to defeat larger-than-life baddies? I would understand your rudeness if Monster Hunter had Player vs Player, in which case your rudeness could be dismissed as trash-talk, but Monster Hunter doesn't and never will will have anything even remotely similar to PVP, due to one of the main themes involves people uniting and working together to accomplish anything. I make it sound like a kids show from the 80's when I put it like that. But my point is, be polite, contribute to the hunt in some way, and try to be supportive.




For those of you who are like, "Holy Wall of Text, Batman!" here's a TL; DR summary. Gather up every material you come across, try out every weapon until you find the one you like most, make sure your armor compliments your weapon, try to spot openings in attack patterns, don't be a jerk when playing in multiplayer, and Have Fun! That should be wrap-up, but what did you think? Will these tips help newcomers out, will this guide inadvertently cause EVEN MORE newcomers to ride the Monster Hunter hype train!? WILL THEY EVER FIX PLESIOTH'S HIP-CHECK!? Go play some Monster Hunter to find out!

*- Valphalk's game, Monster Hunter XX (pronounced "double cross"), was never released outside of Japan for fear of reigniting the video game console wars, which would hurt sales. Which is a shame, since Valphalk has one of the most imaginative concepts for a monster in the franchise. #ValphalkforWorld. #ValphalkforSmash. #BringValphalktotheWest.

**- In case you don't understand, most American gamers prefer home consoles when gaming, while Japanese gamers usually go with handhelds. And since Monster Hunter is a franchise that repeatedly alternates between the two, some folks agree to disagree about whether the franchise is at it's best on handhelds, whose portability helps ease the grind times, or on home consoles, where's much more of a technical powerhouse.

Spider-Man: Homecoming review!

You all knew this would happen. First, not only did they let my all-time favorite Marvel character appear in Captain America: Civil War, they even brought in InsomniacGames to make a Spider-Man video game. And considering that InsomniacGames are one of my all-time favorite game developers, it's basically a match made in heaven. But today, we're not talking about video games for once, but rather, a movie!



Spider-Man: Homecoming. Now for those of you who have somehow never heard of Spider-Man (the character), he is easily one of the most well-known and beloved characters in modern fiction, let alone the Marvel mythos. Long story short, the brilliant but lazy teen genius Peter Parker was given a variety of spider-themed super powers such as shooting webs out of his wrists and clinging to walls/ceilings when he was bitten by a radioactive spider during a high school field trip, and initially used these powers to make money as an entertainer, but when his selfish ambitions get his beloved Uncle Ben killed by a panicked robber, Spider-Man learns the hard way that with Great Power comes Great Responsibility. So he dons a red-and-blue suit, becomes a crime-fighter, and repeatedly saves New York City (sometimes the world) from the likes of homicidal goblins, rhino people, mad scientists, and a evil alien clone of himself at regular intervals. Oh, and Spidey is constantly struggling to balance his superhero activities with his everyday life, which is just as difficult as you might expect from literally the only member of the Avengers that bothers with a secret identity. I kid you not, Spider-Man is the only member of the Avengers that has not once ever made his identity public. Spidey became a hit almost as soon as he made his debut in 1962 thanks to being extremely relatable and being simply adorable (or, depending on who you ask, insanely attractive). As such, he became a crucial hero to many childhoods and is considered to be a positive role model to boys and girls everywhere to this very day.



But considering we had an unfathomable amount of media (movies, comics, cartoons, etc) covering his origins, Spider-Man: Homecoming completely skips the origin story in favor of a Spider-Man ready and raring to go the moment the movie starts. Which is a good thing, because of, well, you know, the whole "Spider-Man is the most well-known character in modern fiction right behind Godzilla and Darth Vader" thing. Reexplaining Spidey's origins for the umpteenth time would not only be repetitive but a waste of time/money for the studio. Says the guy who did a summarized version of Spidey's origins 15 seconds ago.



Spider-Man: Homecoming takes place shortly after the events of Captain America: Civil War (for those not in the know, every Marvel movie ever made takes place in the same world/timeline) and focuses on Peter Parker's high school life in a quiet corner in Queens. That's right. Queens. So no web-swinging hundreds of feet in the air for you! There's nothing to web-swing on in Queens! And this movie is fully aware of this.



Anyway, A large portion of the plot revolves around Spidey trying to prove himself worthy of bearing the title of Avenger while going toe-to-talon with a black arms dealer known as the Vulture, while also juggling his civilian life. All while being accompanied by Ned, the only person who knows Peter's secret identity (unless you count Mary Jane Watson, Spidey's love interest from the comics and the original trilogy, but she isn't in this movie), and his most loyal friend.



While I like the movie's story for the most part, something I loathe is the unforgivable idiocy on Tony Stark/Iron Man's part. Did I forget to mention that IRON MAN is in this movie? Because he is, but here he makes the unfathomably terrible decision to not only ignore/dismiss Spidey, he also leaves him out of the loop 98% of the time, and MILD SPOILER ALERT! one of the villain's most destructive rampage could have been prevented had Iron Man actually tell Spidey what was going on. The only reason they had Mr. Stark do this is to fulfill the age-old "Not Now, Kiddo" trope (where an older/more experienced character ignores the younger character even if the younger character knows something that could turn the tides in the heroes' favor). Do you realize how annoying that trope is for me? I've seen it used and abused for most of my life, but this instance is especially frustrating because not only has Spider-Man proven himself competent back in Civil War (he went one-on-one with Captain America, for crying out loud), but it also brings up a curious conundrum. If Iron Man didn't trust Spidey enough to handle major Avenger-y things like oh I don't know, fighting off Captain America and his splinter group of rogue Avengers, why did he even bother recruiting Spider-Man in the first place? The answer to this is because the writers couldn't think of any way to advance the plot without resorting to an age-old cliche. Don't get me wrong, I like Iron Man, but sometimes, Marvel makes some questionable choices that make you go "WHY!?" *cough cough* Captain America kissing the niece of his dead girlfriend *cough cough*



Anyway, on a more positive note, this film is much funnier than all of the previous films combined. Mostly because there are way too many moments in the older movies that are meant to be serious, but thanks to awkward line delivery or bizarre facial expressions made the previous movies a lot goofier than intended. This movie is a straight up comedy, due to putting more of an emphasis on Spidey being a "Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man". Chief among these jokes include Peter and Ned building a LEGO Death Star, Spidey trying to master the advanced settings in his suit, and basically anything that comes out of antisocial smart-aleck Michelle. That said, there were a few jokes that I feel kind of fell flat on their metaphorical faces, such as the cringe-inducingly inappropriate nickname Flash the High-School bully comes up for Peter, which comes across as Marvel trying to appeal to the older, more mature crowd. Why am I making a big deal out of inappropriate humor? First of all, this is a Spider-man movie, and Spider-Man is one of my favorite anythings ever when I was a kid and is still one of my favorite Marvel characters, so including humor not meant for children is kind of like punching my nostalgia in the face. Maybe I'm just being a prude, but it also doesn't help that those kind of jokes are not even remotely funny to me, if anything they're more annoying than anything else. Second of all, the main difference between DC Comics and Marvel, is that DC has always had the gall to go to dark, decidedly family-UNfriendly places, while Marvel is where the True Believers hang. *Excelsior!



 But you wanna know what the best part of this whole movie was? Micheal Keaton as the Vulture. Marvel normally have kind of lame villains that are just there to serve as the good guys' punching bag. Vulture breaks that trend thanks to A) being played by Micheal Keaton, who does a phenomenal performance here B) having a visually impressive design. If you read the old-school Spider-Man comics, Vulture had a slightly cheesey design, being in a (VERY) bright green jumpsuit covered in feathers. Here, the Vulture is more akin to Sam Raimi's version of the Green Goblin, and sports a similar fighting style (only without the Jack-o-lantern bombs). And C) He's played by Micheal Keaton. In other words, this movie is, if you think about it, Spider-Man vs Bat-Man.



As for the rest of the cast, we have Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark/Iron Man, who always does a good job playing the charismatic leader of the Avengers (or what's left of the Avengers), but as previously stated, the story writers make him do some moronic things but I'm going to blame the writers, not the actor. We also have Tom Holland as Spider-Man/Peter Parker, the star of the show. Tom Holland does a surprisingly good job as everyone's favorite web-slinger, and I dare say Tom Holland is better than Toby Maguire, which is high praise, because let's face it, Toby Maguire did a fantastic job in the role during his time. Only Tom Holland beats him out by A) portraying Peter in a more faithful-to-the-source-material way (he's less of hard-working everyman and more of a lovable nerd), and B) there's no Emo Dance in this movie. For better or for worse. I know some people will never let Toby Maguire live down the sheer corniness of the infamous Emo Dance We also have Zendaya as Michelle, a minor supporting character that has some of the funniest lines in the movie due to her snarky attitude, and Jacob Batalon (how is it this guy has the most epic sounding last name!? It's like "Battle" and "Talon" put together!) as Ned, who wins the official "Spencer's Day Best Sidekick of the Year 2017" award. Only now do I realize how silly and non-indicative the title of my blog sounds. But I've called this blog "Spencer's Day" since I was 11 years old, so it's too late to change it. Anyway, we also have Marisa Tomei as Peter Parker's Aunt May, and basically the entire thought process that went into her character was, "Let's cut Aunt May's canonical age in half so she isn't elderly anymore". And last but not least we have Laura Harrier playing Liz, Spidey's love interest in this movie. Her performance was alright. Not bad. But considering I've never heard of her prior to looking the cast for this movie, her performance wasn't like "Who is this woman and why is she such a good actress!?", but more like "Yeah, that was pretty good, looking forward to what you do next.". Does that make any sense?



Anyways, as for the presentation, the set pieces aren't as grand or exotic when compared to previous Marvel movies, although that is deliberate. Remember when I said that this movie emphasizes Peter's status as a "Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man"? Well that's because the scale of this movie is just that. A Neighborhood. Spidey rarely leaves his quiet corner of Queens, and the two times he does are only at most 5 minutes long. Heck, even the villain's evil plans are smaller in scope than the Marvel norm. Instead of being a reality-breaking tyrant trying to devour the universe like Thanos, or a heartless machine trying to destroy humanity and replace it with machines like Ultron, the Vulture is literally just a black market dealer trying to make some money. And even then, his motivation doesn't come down to simple greed. I won't spoil it here, but his motivation is part of the reason why the Vulture is one of Marvel's better villains. The visual effects are also nice. Funnily enough, before watching the movie I've heard some folks say that the visuals are unbearably cheesy, but, I don't have a problem with them. But hey, agree to disagree. The music in this film is frankly forgettable, but I'll give this movie a slide because quite frankly, the only times I expect decent music from a movie is if the movie is a musical.



Overall, I give Spider-Man: Homecoming an 8/10. While this movie is a welcome change of pace from most of Marvel's other works and good for a few laughs, I feel the movie could have been a lot better if it didn't have such inappropriate humor and a more creative way of advancing the plot than what wound up in the final version of Spider-Man: Homecoming.

P.S. Is it sad that I like the cartoons more than the movies? Ultimate Spider-Man was just so over-the-top that it was basically an anime. If you haven't watched Ultimate Spider-Man, go watch it like right now. It's really good.

*-Yes. I just used Stan Lee's signature catchphrase on my blog.

Minecraft Story Mode Season 2: Jailhouse Block review!

Is there such a thing as too much Minecraft Story Mode? Telltale doesn't think so, since they released episode three of Season 2 a lot quicker than most people were expecting But now comes my little predicament. At this point, it's safe to say we'll be covering inevitable spoilers. My review, as always, will keep spoilers to a minimum, but if you do care about spoilers, rest assured that this review will not contain spoilers for this episode in particular, but it's going to be difficult to not spoil previous episodes, so if you haven't played Minecraft Story Mode Season 2 and have been thinking about getting it, go for the gold.



This episode of the point-and-click BLOCK-busting (geddit?) adventure, titled Jailhouse Block, picks up right where the previous episode left off. After revealing his true identity, the Admin (who will be your villain for this season) sends the main hero Jesse and his/her Friends to a prison known as the Sunshine Institute, which is literally at the bottom of the world (wouldn't be the center of the world though? #StoryModeLogic) filled with people who have opposed the Admin in the past... And Bob Ross.



The entire episode is spent trying to escape this prison, and before anyone puts on the Captain Obvious cap and say "But it's Minecraft! They can just punch/mine their way to freedom!" They can't. Not only is the entire prison inside the center of a labyrinth made of Obsidian, which in the Minecraft universe can only be destroyed by a Diamond Pickaxe (or better, if you take fan made mods into account since literally every fan made mod adds something better than Diamond), but the entire facility has permanent Mining Fatigue (a kind of spell that makes blocks harder to destroy) AND the ground is made of Bedrock, which is completely indestructible. Something that I think is kind of a missed opportunity is how despite the fact that Minecraft Story Mode is a game where your moral choices have a butterfly effect and permanently alter the story, you don't have any choice in your escape plan. I mean, how you pull it off is up to you, but it stays largely the same regardless of what kind of playthrough you're doing.



But all in all, the story was good. It had decent pacing, and seeing a Minecraft-ized prison is oddly humorous. This prison here is also surprisingly sadistic, to say the least. In one cell block, the inmates are literally forced to fight over a small handful of mushrooms or risk starving starve to death. In another, the inmates are have no choice but to kill (and EAT!!!) endless hordes of zombies every few minutes. That second one is definitely disturbing both in the context of the Minecraft universe and out. Seriously, it's like something out of a psychological horror film, but cleverly disguised as a kids' game.



The gameplay here is again, near identical to that of the previous episodes. Or literally any game made by TellTale. It's divided into three segments, the first and most frequently used of the three are interactive cutscenes where you can pick and choose what Jesse says/does during cutscenes. They're nice for immersion, though on subsequent playthroughs some of the choices's consequences felt anticlimactic. The most egregious example is when MILD SPOILER ALERT! Jesse's adorable secretary Radar (aka YURI LOWENTHAL!!!!) is being tortured as leverage to convince Jesse to join the "Dark Side" so to speak. On my first playthrough I was under the impression that Radar would die if you chose not to comply, and being the nice guy that I am, I decided to comply so that Radar wouldn't die. Then I did a second playthrough and out of curiosity I decided not to comply, and turns out Radar survives the torture no matter what, but his glasses will remain broken for the rest of the season (which is kind of mundane given he was being tortured). One of my biggest pet peeves with Story Mode is how some choices are drastic, but others have near-identical outcomes. It kind of kills the immersion a little when your choices don't have as much of an impact. Then again, it's entirely possible that these seemingly miniscule choices do have more pronounced consequences once Episodes 4 and 5 are released. Plus, I can only imagine the nightmares TellTale has when scripting possible outcomes.



The other two segments I found more enjoyable this time around. The action sequences, while chock full of Quick Time Events, are incredibly fun to watch. Performing well at the action sequences results in Jesse being as acrobatic as a Matrix character with swordplay rivaling that of a Jedi Knight. That is very high praise in case you don't speak nerd. It's also true with the previous two episodes, but I never brought it up until now. It's definitely a step up from when Jesse was a clumsy novice back in Season 1 and really shows that TellTale has been sure to keep him/her in top shape. I also liked the one-vs-one (sometimes one-vs-three) sword duels where you control Jesse directly, especially a climatic duel that I won't spoil here.


Cool Minecrafters don't look at explosions

And finally, the tried'n'true point-and-click adventure format that makes up the last segment of the gameplay. During these segments, Jesse is free to roam around as s/he pleases, click on objects to examine/interact with them, solve puzzles, and talk to NPC's. New to this season however is the ability to freely build whatever you desire within certain spaces, and some objectives require you to build SOMETHING. These segments are the rarest of them all (in this episode they are used literally three times total) but are still enjoyable. I know some folks despise them due to being comparatively "boring", but they break up the pace rather fluidly and give you, the player, a breather.



Also, this episode has some plot revelations that are intriguing to say the least. The Admin, as a villain, is still a fantastic villain, thanks to his charmingly flamboyant personality and some amazing voice-work. My only real concern with the Admin is at the present moment, he seems a little too powerful. I mean, yeah, he's the closest thing the Minecraft universe has to a god. But seriously, he can shape-shift, warp reality, use telekinesis, has an immunity to most weapons, and can build entire structures in a fraction of a second (one power that every Minecraft player wished they had). In other words, he is by far the most powerful villain Jesse and Friends have faced. This is similar to a problem that the Pokemon franchise as well as the Dragon Ball franchise have, they keep trying to make their villains grander and more powerful than the previous one. At least Pokemon solved their problem by having the most recent villains (Team Skull!) be significantly less imposing than their predecessors to "reset" the cycle. In the event we get a season 3, or heck, an Adventure Pass (Adventure Passes are things TellTale makes for their particularly successful games that extends the season by an additional three episodes), the only way for them to continue is to "reset" the cycle as well. My point is, it's going to be EXTREMELY difficult to make a Story Mode villain as good as the Admin.



And of course, I have to talk about the moment towards the final act of this episode. If you don't want spoilers, skip on ahead. Basically, later on in this episode, you will be forced to make a sadistic choice of impeccable scale. Without ruining it too much, I can say that this choice alone is part of why I consider this episode to be better than the previous episode. It literally made me pause the game, put my controller down, think real hard about the decision, make the decision after ten minutes of mentally battling myself, feel incredibly guilty about it afterwards, play through the game on my backup save file, make the opposite choice, and STILL feel guilty about it. You know how I griped about them giving Radar Plot Armor during the torture scene? This decision has the kind of depth I wanted from the torture scene. It's the kind of choice that will have very dramatic consequences, and I love it when games make choices actually matter. Basically, that choice is a "story altering" decision done right.



As for the presentation, the artstyle is still the same old "world is made out of cubes" aesthetic that the original Minecraft became famous for. The set-pieces are nice, as the Sunshine Institute looks like a stereotypical maximum security prison but in Minecraft form. But other than that, it's fairly average. The music is slower and more atmospheric than the norm, which fits the whole, "trapped at the bottom/center of the world in a nigh-inescapable prison" motif. It's also heavy on the percussions, now that I'm thinking about it.


Giiiiiiii!!!!!!!

This episode might be my favorite of this season so far, thanks to the prison motif and having a gut-wrenching choice towards the end, but it has yet to top Episode 5 of Season 1, which remains to this day my favorite thanks to not only canonizing the popular fan-made Minecraft minigame/self-imposed challenge known as Skyblock (where a group of Minecraft players are trapped on a floating island and have to micromanage limited resources while completing as many tasks given to them as humanly possible) but also being by far the most self-contained episode without being a pointless filler episode (looking at you, Episode 8). I give this episode a 9/10.

P.S. Before you ask, yes, Bob Ross is actually in this episode. Sort of. There's an NPC called Rob that looks like a Minecraft-ized version of Bob Ross.