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Thursday, March 31, 2016

UNDERTALE WAS IN THE NEWS!? Plus Science Spencer rant!

WARNING: This post contains a lot of me being somewhat of a jerk and even tackling some themes a little bit more mature than what is normal. But when something like this comes calling, you HAVE to answer. So I will be that guy to explain why this Fool of a Took is such an idiot.

So I was goofing around on my PC reading up on the wiki and then I saw this somewhere.

Image result for undertale news report

So I did some digging around and this is an actual news story from 700 Club. But let's take a look shall we?

It reads "Recently, I was through my daughter's phone and I found many pictures of a cartoon skeleton with one glowing blue eye and wearing a hoodie. When I asked my daughter why she had such demonic images on her phone, she told me there was nothing wrong with it because it was from a video game."

For those of you who never played Undertale, there is only ONE video game character in existence that matches the description given. That is arguably everyone's (including mine) favorite character.

Image result for sans

Sans! But whoever this parent is, they OBVIOUSLY have no idea who Sans is if they think this guy looks demonic.

Also, in case you never played Undertale, Sans is a living skeleton with a love of puns and ketchup. He is also the final boss but ONLY if you have killed every enemy in the game. Why? Because at that point, the game has labeled you, the player, a psychotic sicko who just *murdered their way through an underground kingdom, just to get an entirely optional ending that once obtained, can NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES be taken back. The game will permanently remember that you got the WORST possible ending and alter the Pacifist ending (aka the happy ending) to remind you of your sins.

And what does Sans do during a Genocide Run (as the Undertale fandom nicknamed this act)? He is like "I am sick and tired of you murdering everything in your path. So you know what? GET DUNKED ON!!!!"

So calling this guy evil is a real insult-to-injury for me. No one who ACTUALLY understands how Undertale works would even think to call Sans evil.

Image result for evil spongebob

I'm sorry if I am being a rant-sputtering jerk criticizing an obviously out-of-the-loop parent who, guessing from the way they wrote that message, never sat down and played a decent video game before. It's a case of some idiot making a idiotic guess at something. But as a gamer, I DON'T GIVE A DANG OVER WHETHER YOU FIND SOMETHING RELIGIOUSLY OFFENSIVE!!! IT'S A FREAKING GAME!! TAKE IT HOW IT WAS INTENDED, DANG IT!! Although there are some really inappropriate games out there that glamorizes violence, drugs, etc etc *cough cough* Fallout *cough cough*

It's like the time when people accused freaking POKEMON of all things to be inappropriate for children because of it being "religiously offensive". Well guess what? Saying you don't believe in evolution actually translates to you not believing that man came from ape. Which is not how evolution actually works.

*Puts on nerdy scientist glasses* You see, evolution, or should I say natural selection, is when there are several variations of a species. Over time some of those variations die off due to lacking a trait that other variations have. That gives the surviving variations less competition and in turn lets them survive and multiply much more frequently. So evolution at the end of the day comes down to Mother Nature taking which variations she wants, and leaving the rest high and dry. Simple as that.

Besides, if anything, Undertale has one of the best positive messages for children as the game teaches (and encourages) solving conflicts non-violently.

Image result for undertale news report
As one can see on the Steam page

If you have the guts (and the bad morale compass) to murder everyone...Well let's just say...

Image result for chara undertale jumpscare

"You are not above consequences." - Chara, 201X.

But yeah! I apologize if this post seems mean/jerky/unpleasent and double sorry if I made you question your faith somehow. I have a feeling I will regret publishing this post. =S

Oh, and if the parent that sent that message to 700 Club is reading this, just be glad your kid didn't have any Chara pictures! (Chara is the little kid in the green sweater by the way).

Image result for chara undertale
Well, they did their creepy face! Are
you happy now!?

But in all seriousness. There is only one thing to do now. I'm going to go on YouTube, Reddit, and GameFAQS and see if any one else is as salty as I am about a out-of-the-loop parent calling the most popular character of Undertale evil.

Image result for evil spongebob

Yeah... This post is quickly making me remember why I stick to video game and movie reviews lol. But anyway, if you enjoyed me going on a massive rant on stuff, then good for you! If you did not enjoy then that's understandable since this is a surprisingly negative blog post. #SaltySpencer.

I do not mean to offend anybody. As a gamer and a scientist, it is my responsibility to clarify some absurdly common misconceptions. Before you ask, yes, I do believe in God. Do I let my belief in a higher power cloud my better judgement and make idiotic assumptions about anything like the concerned parent that sent the message that was the cause of this blog post? No.

P.S. Knowing that this person has made a gamer so salty he did a blog post about it...

It fills you with DETERMINATION!!!

*- In case you were wondering, I did use the word "murder" on purpose since the game makes it clear very early on that you are a terrible person for killing someone.

1 comment:

  1. Three Undertale posts on this blog! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!